Day 30 - The V Word (Masters of Horror)

Since I was so impressed with the last installment of MoH that I saw... I thought I'd give this vampire one a shot.

*yawnfest. Kids go into a funeral home.. find a vampire (Michael Ironside), he kills one, that one becomes a vampire, kills the other one, and then the "turned" one goes through the process of becoming a vampire, and must decide if he should kill his family or ...

Like I said, *yawn*. I like Michael Ironside, I always have. However, this one falls majorly short.

Day 29 : Motel Hell

Another "classic" that I'd actually never seen. Took Netflix forever to get this one in. Oddly enough, as soon as they did, it ended up on TMC the very same night. HA!

Anyway, I ended up watching it. I had hoped for extreme cheese, 80's style. What I got, however, was a movie that I felt walked the line of ridiculous and over the top. This is the kind of movie, with a premise as crazy as this, it should have gone over the top one way or the other, and it never seemed to do so. It seemed TOO formulaic. I expected either a comedic extreme, or just a crazy bizarre dark movie, and I don't felt it went dark enough or to the extreme one way or the other, and that, to me, made for a yawnfest.

Now THIS is a movie, in my opinion, that is prime for a remake.. a movie that had a GREAT idea, but didn't flesh it out (HA) enough.

Day 28 - American Horror Story

After all the rave reviews I heard about it, I figured I needed to check this out. I watched the pilot episode.


How wild! First of all, it's ghost story/haunted house type shit. I LOVE THAT SHIT.
Plus? It's weird. Like my favorite horror character May says...

"I like weird."

This is like David Lynch-slightly-diluted weird. I like that.

I'm a big fan of Jessica Lange as well. The house also reminds me very much of a house we kids used to hang around that was haunted, so that's a bonus, I've only seen the first episode and will catch up before the weekend is out, but nicely done! I finally have an acceptable alternative to the Walking Dead!!!
i wanted the opposite of this

Day 27 : Martyrs

I'd been hearing so much about this movie, and how graphic it was, I figured I'd check it out.

Well, hm.

I've heard it referred to as torture porn. I'm not sure I'd agree with that. Saw? Hostel? I think those writers saw this movie and completely didn't get the point. Or they should have watched this to understand a bit better. As you know, I DESPISE gratuitous gore. Is this movie graphic and disturbing at times? Yes. But I liken it to movies like AntiChrist. It's gutsy (no pun intended), original, cold, and methodical. The clinical detachment is what makes it truly horrorific. It was bleak, it evoked sadness through its assault. It's grotesque.

The French brought us Haute Tension, and this is another decent one that should be put on that shelf. I wouldn't watch this again, though. Not because it's disturbing (and it is), but because this sort of horror doesn't do it for me, and isn't my thing.
Haunted vagina

Day 26 - Paranormal Activity 3

Day 26 - Paranormal Activity 3

I wasn't going to watch this, but after seeing so many people get MAD at how bad it was, I figured I might as well round out the trilogy.

One of the genius things about this film, is not the film itself. This series happens to be a series people either love or hate with a passion. THOSE are the movies that tend to be successful. Love it or hate it, it gets a buzz going.

I *did* like the first one. I didn't care about the characters, and I highly enjoyed the original ending more, and I disliked the whole "demon/beast" idea. HOWEVER, I'm one of those people who have HAD experiences like portrayed in the movie, so it did scare me. The second one, not so much. Apparently, the filmmakers found a niche, because they did nothing but repeat the formula, which seems to be working as this movie was, I read, had the highest grossing launch of a horror movie.

Am I mad about this movie? No. But I do agree that it is ridiculous. I understand it was "filmed" in the 80's, but the whole "coven" and "witchcraft" angle did nothing more than make me roll my eyes in annoyance. Completely absurd and unbelievable. I watched and saw absolutely nothing of interest in this movie.

Day 25 - The Manitou

I wanna smack the idjit who recommended this to me. I'm all for cheesy. I'm all for bad cheesy. With Tony Curtis. I read the reviews, and gave it a shot. This was stupid, and not in a good way. I tried to force my way through it, but failed. As ridiculous as the plot is, it simply was not interesting. Tony Curtis dancing around in a fake moustache and wizard outfit, a four foot Native American covered with goo.... it just didn't do it. Just.. not good. At all.

Day 24 : Mad Monster Party

I know, this is taking us back. But considering this is an hour and a half long, it counts as a movie. I'd seen bits and pieces as a kid back in the day, but never did I ever sit and watch it all the way through.

I miss the era of Rankin and Bass, and I tried to introduce my kids to the old school style of claymation. Of course, my efforts were in vain, but I sat down and watched it all anyway.

It didn't deserve to be an hour and a half long, that's for sure. It could have been an hour, a half hour even, and it probably would be have a bigger success. But for those who are a fan of the Kriofft brothers era, or love classic monsters/horror, this kicks ass. Ridiculous writing, catchy songs, and well, Peter Lorre... although it's not Peter Lorre... or Jimmy Stewart, who's not Jimmy Stewart. Great throwback stuff :)

Day 23 : Masters of Horror : Right to Die

With a week until Halloween, I'm running out of decent movies to check out on Netflix Instant. I decided to check out a bit more of the Masters of Horror series, since I've enjoyed a lot of them. Right to Die came highly rated.

I'm not familiar with any of Rob Schmidt's work, although now I may look him up. BRAVO! Fantastic episode that I really found brilliantly creepy, not to mention a fascinating bit of a twist ending. I know this is a very short review, but I have nothing but wonderful things to say about every aspect of this piece.

Day 22 : The Pit and the Pendulum (1991)

Day 22 : The Pit and the Pendulum (1991)

I was curious about this remake ever seeing Stuart Gordon take on "The Black Cat" in the Masters of Horror series. With a cast like Lance Henriksen, Tom Towles, and Jeffrey Combs, I thought this may be watchable. Was I ever wrong.

Subtlety has been abandoned in favour of gross-out horror - nudity, gore and all-round unpleasantness. OK it's ridiculous, trashy, sensationalised and historically dubious (did any members of the Inquisition really wear horn-rimmed glasses?). Also, has very little in common with its predecessor or with Poe's original story. It's ironic that Full Moon's DVD carries the more aptly "The Inquisitor" title in the opening credits. Because that is what the film is about.

This movie did nothing for me and I had a hard time finishing it because it was just so ridiculous.
seen the truth

Day 21 : The Pit and the Pendulum

Day 21 : Pit and the Pendulum

I'm a big fan of Roger Corman. Likewise, a big fan of Vincent Price. ALSO, a big fan of Poe, so why had I not seen this before? Not sure, really. But.. BAD FAN!

This is a typical Corman classic, which is completely enough for me. They don't make them like Vincent Price anymore, and the man is downright riveting to watch in any performance. The scenery is downright breathtaking Vincent Price plays a wimp, which is totally out of typical character for him, but he still does it convincingly well. Everyone else int he film is just fodder, and they really don't matter because Vincent is just that good. Magnificent horror film, especially for a Gothic horror fan like myself.